What If...

Those of you who know me (or who have read some of my earlier blogs) know that few things in this world fire me up as much as complaining and entitlement.  I have recently come to view these two unfortunate aspects of human nature as much more entwined than previously thought.

This small revelation came to light as I was watching yet another of the many recent attacks on Oprah Winfrey from one of the multitude of groups that, for some reason, sees her as a detriment to our culture.   Whether it’s for accepting other notions of god or for championing (or exploiting as some choose to see it) the causes of the unfortunate, Oprah always seems to be on some complaint-mongers radar.

On her worst day, I believe that Oprah never descends into anything beneath a rich, powerful woman who thrives on giving back to the community and feeling like she’s using her incredible influence to make a difference.  Who cares if attention comes along with that?  - At least she’s doing something!

To this very point – many of these people who choose to strike, complain, and attack are the same ones who often are doing nothing to contribute to society.  Especially on the level of someone like Oprah.  But yet they feel this massive sense of entitlement that allows them to criticize the efforts of others.

Complaints are nothing but noise.  Empty, hollow, sad noise that comes from those who usually are the ones who don’t take actual action.

Imagine if instead of finding fault with others, we poured our energy into developing our own solutions for that which we don’t like or want to change.  Instead of attacking people like Oprah, we should praise them for at least trying to make positive change.  Teach and enlighten the world and your community through conviction and example, not through the corrosive power of bitter words.  After all, when was the last time anyone was inspired by a complaint?

Why Not…

• Why not act instead of complain?  Work to help fix whatever it is you don’t like.

Do you know what one in every four homeless people has in common?

I was completely blown away when I recently learned that one in every four homeless people is a vet of some war.  I mean, are you kidding me?  I’m sure many people are already sadly aware of this statistic, but I was floored nonetheless.  Viet Nam vets still make up the bulk of these numbers but studies suggest that we are only at the tip of the iceberg in terms of Iraq and Afghanistan vets who will develop post traumatic stress disorder and be unable to deal with the aftermath of war; they will become unable to hold a job, have a relationship, sleep at night, escape the pain without drugs or alcohol.

For a nation who now prides itself on “being there” for its dedicated soldiers, this is completely unacceptable!

What does the ever-present yellow ribbon we wear on our shirts or stick to our car bumper symbolize?  That we support our troops and that we hope to avoid the same mistakes we made with our Viet Nam vets, right?

This resolution has been felt nationwide ever since our troops first went into Afghanistan for “Desert Storm” in the early nineties and it is even more prevalent today as our men and women who serve in Iraq and Afghanistan are given a hero’s welcome at every turn while they’re overseas and in uniform.

But where this “support” currently ends is exactly when our troops need it the most – after the dust has settled.

Unnerving reports of increasing numbers of our Iraq and Afghanistan vets turning to homelessness and addiction are suggesting that the support they truly need from us and our government comes well after their tour of duty has ended.  It’s easy to stand up and applaud and sing the praises of a young man or woman who sacrifices his/her life in service of this country but it is another thing, a much tougher thing, to deal with the reality that they often return from war with deep emotional and physical damage and are unable to acclimate back into normal society. 

Why Not…

• Why not demand and/or support local and state legislation that addresses the growing problem of our soldiers’ mental condition?
• Why not sponsor or become involved in such not-for-profit organizations such as the Iraq War Veteran’s Organization Inc. that champion the needs of our soldiers and their families both overseas and at home?

A couple months ago I wrote an entry for this blog that I never ended up posting entitled What if Politics were Cool?   The sentiment was simple:  If we, as a nation, all got as excited over and became as engaged in political and governmental processes as we do football games and Brittany Spears’ forays into lunacy, then we would be well on our way to regaining the passion and awareness that once made us the global beacon for successful democracy.

I can’t recall exactly why I choose not to publish that piece.  What I do know is that, had I posted it, I’d be looking pretty darn prophetic right now.

Something amazing has begun in this country since the beginning of these primary elections.  People are collectively putting this election and its players in the forefront of their minds and the fever is spreading like wildfire.  Debates have become a prime topic for office water-cooler conversation and spirited banter over the qualifications and merits of the worthy candidates can be heard everywhere from pubs to train stations to gyms.  What a beautiful, beautiful thing!

Whether it’s Obama with his energy and charisma, Hillary with her steadfast resolve and experience, or McCain with his firm convictions, we sense quality and competence in these candidates and we feel inspired and obligated to join the fun. 

Oh, my gosh … are politics actually becoming cool again?!

How many of us have ever had a “gut” feeling of something being right or wrong? I think it would be fair to say just about everyone has at one time or another. The question is, did you listen to your gut or did your brain rationalize something different? How did it end up? Was your gut right or your brain?

I have a passion for studying people and their behaviors. For example, why some people are successful and why others continuously fail. There are many attributes that lead to one’s success but one thing I find in common with many of the most influential people I meet is that they often say, at the end of the day, they listen to their gut.

Our “gut” reactions are an incredibly potent tool yet, oddly enough, they are seldom talked about in the boardroom as these days only that which can be quantified or qualified is given true weight. While intellectual input is crucial, why do we not put as much emphasis on our hidden, higher intellect—called our instincts? Aren’t instincts something that we’re born with in order to survive?

There is an interesting book called “Blink” in which the author explores the phenomenon of rapid cognition or, in simpler terms, our immediate (within the first two seconds) instinctive impression of a person, place, or situation. His argument is that it is within these first two seconds, we many times form our most reliable and accurate synopses and that everything else after potentially only serves to convolute the truth.

Regardless of your belief on such a theory, we cannot reject the notion that our instincts are worth paying a good amount of attention to and that there is a wealth of untapped knowledge within them. Perhaps if we quiet all the other chaotic voices around us and focus on the one coming from our heart, mind, and soul, we’ll find ourselves making decisions more in tune with who we are and where our happiness truly lies.

WHY NOT…?

• Why not learn more about instinctual intelligence? You may be surprised reflecting back to realize where your smartest decisions have come from.

• Why not understand the value of your instincts while making important decisions? - focus on how these decisions make you feel inside instead of just how they seem on paper or in your mind.

How do you determine success? I assume we overwhelmingly qualify it in terms of income or materialistic value as I have never heard someone define another’s success by their happiness –a component I believe to be the fundamental element of success.

I have met many wildly financially “successful” men and women whom seem to have everything in life except the most important thing….happiness.  Let me quickly reject the notion that I think abundant wealth is a trade-off of any sort for happiness—on the contrary. I think financial success can alleviate a lot of burden and give people the opportunity of self-fulfillment through helping others.  What saddens me is when someone sacrifices happiness for financial gains or a title that they think will intrinsically satisfy them.

When I wake up in the morning I am excited to start my day almost like a child who leaps out of bed simply to play all day. My exuberance and wonder for what the day has in store for me makes me grateful for the decisions I have made and the course my life has taken.

I am saddened when I do not see people enjoying what they do and only doing it because they feel they have no choice, or believe that’s how people will perceive them to be successful.  They do not realize that happiness is a pillar of true success.

To be happy or passionate about who you are and what you’re doing can be the fuel and clarity to not only achieve but surpass your goals.  If financial wealth and social status are meant to come, they will find you.  They will come as you discover your true passions and, instead of being that of empty ambition, they will enhance your life while allowing you to experience the fulfillment that comes from doing what you love and from helping others in need.

So, if success is measured by happiness….do you consider yourself successful? 

Why Not… 

• Why not evaluate what you’re doing in your life.  Are you feeding your happiness or your ego and society’s expectations?

Give a man a fish and you have fed him for today.  Teach a man to fish and you have fed him for a lifetime.

We’ve all heard this old proverb since we were born and understand what it means.  I think that we all could probably agree that it represents one of the simplest and most basic truths of our existence: the need for self-reliance.  Somehow, though, when it comes to our economic legislation and practices, we ignore this fact of life, this pillar of our nation’s origins; we repeatedly choose time and time again to take the tried-and-never-worked “give the man a fish” approach and thereby just continue to plug this massive, crumbling dam that is our economy with pieces of chewed Dentyne.

(I know.  Here I go again on the economy but can you blame me?  All that’s been reported on the last few days is our debatably imminent recession; how it’s causing other foreign markets to tank, and what our leaders and presidential hopefuls propose to do about it.  In other words – this is about as important, relevant, and timely as an issue gets so I don’t feel bad about harping on this two weeks in a row—especially because I have YET to hear some good solutions.)

I find it beyond maddening that as we sit amidst these new global dynamics and circumstances (which have changed the rules, principles, and nature of our economic landscape forever) that everyone from our candidates to our congress to our president is offering nothing but that which has already proven not to work in the face of these new realities. 

-          Bush wants to give money back to us via tax breaks.  So we’ll spend our little bit of extra money and stimulate the economy for a quick minute before returning to this exact same predicament.

-          Hillary is leading the charge to levy higher taxes on those in higher income brackets</